Two Pallets is what I woke up to …

June 18, 2026

As the Lowe’s truck drove away, I was left with bag after bag of black gravel, shrink-wrapped on pallets and a good deal larger than I had pictured in my head. These rocks are but the latest adventure in my story that began, the way these things do, with a television commercial. The same one

How Long Does It Take to Fill Three 50-Gallon Rain Barrels?

June 11, 2026

How long does it take to fill three 50-gallon rain barrels?One rainy day in Houston, it seems. I’ll get to that.But before I tell you about the barrels, you should know something about the man who installed them.I have never claimed to be handy. I can change a light bulb (if someone holds the ladder),

Over the years you’ve said the nicest things about the Duck and all that we have done to bring joy into your lives. But here is the truth. It’s not us. You bring the joy. Every time you walk through our door.

June 1, 2026

🎉  36 years. Happy, grateful, and full of love for every single one of you. Monday, June 1st marks our 36th year in business. I’ve been out walking this morning, turning that number over in my head, and wondering how we ever even made it through those first five years. They say those are the

“Cataract removal will be a breeze,” the doctor assured me, “and with your new lenses calibrated to your prescription, you can kiss those glasses goodbye forever.”

But blurry vision turned out to be the least of my problems. That verdict came from a higher authority, Dr. TWWNCBUIP (also known as the wife) who delivered her diagnosis with the cheerful certainty of someone who has already looked up the answer. The prescription: a full-body tune-up, and no appeals would be entertained. The

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da (La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la)

October 14, 2025

You guessed it. I was at the Paul McCartney show last week. It had been more than twenty years since I’d last seen him live, and I’m happy to report that the man, much like me, hasn’t aged. Unlike me, though, he still remembers every word to every song. We should all have that kind

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